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Readers Ask about USA

Here are some answers to some questions readers of Metropolitni Expres have been asking us about America: Q: "I want to travel to the USA and go hunting for alligators on the Mississippi River? Is this the best place for me to do it?" Dara

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Jerry97

Hi Jana

The Garden State is one of two states where it's illegal to fill 'er up yourself. Only gas station owners or employees can pump gas in New Jersey and Oregon -- "the only two states atavistic, sadistic, and masochistic enough to still require thousands of 'professionals' to waste time, money, and inconvenience customers," according to this columnist: Rv 

http://www.nationalreview.com/comment/comment-schaeffer090803.asp

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8.8.2007 21:52

Monstrum Anonymič Anonymov

Zavřete tlamy nebo mluvte česky, jste v Česku !

:-)

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8.8.2007 19:28

captain cook

Re: Zavřete tlamy nebo mluvte česky, jste v Česku !

Kolik jazyku znas, tolikrat jsi clovekem.;-):-P

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9.8.2007 4:58

Jerry97

Hi Dara

Welcome to the Mississippi Alligator Hunting Information Webpage :-)

http://www.mdwfp.com/level2/Wildlife/Game/Alligator/default.asp

 

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8.8.2007 14:11

Jerry97

Re: Hi Dara

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Mississippi. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the 'no haggle' attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, 'Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!'    Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and hauled it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouted out, 'Damn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!'

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9.8.2007 1:25

Marushka23

how funny

omg, these are the oldest and dumbest "jokes" I've heard...

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8.8.2007 10:53

Jerry97

Re: how funny

A blond was shopping at Kotva and came across a shiny silver thermos.

She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and took it over to the

clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, "why, that's a thermos....

it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."

"Wow," said the blond, "that's amazing....I'm going to buy it!" So she took the thermos and took it to work the next day. ... Her boss, who is also blond, saw it on her desk."What's that?" he asked. "Why, that's a thermos...it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,"she replied. "What do you have in it?"asked the boss, ... "Two popsicles and some coffee" 

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8.8.2007 14:35

Marushka23

Re: Re: how funny

okay, that one is better ;-D

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8.8.2007 16:58

Jerry97

Re: Re: Re: how funny

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, who were all stranded on an island.  ......... One day they found a genie and he said he would grant them three wishes.  All three of them agreed that each of them would get one wish each.

The brunette said, "I wish I was home in my bed and that this never happened.", and poof her wish was granted.

The redhead said, "I wish that I was at home in my bed and this never happened.", and poof her wish was granted.

Then the blond said, "I wish my friends were here with me."

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8.8.2007 23:35

Jerry97

Re: Re: Re: how funny

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general, and all in the name of humor!" The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little sh*t on your knee."

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8.8.2007 23:48





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