Write Good Power Pointies - Part 2

Today, our focus is on Power Point slides and how to make them so that even the dumbest person will be able to understand your, well, point. As we explained yesterday, REAL M-E-N just L-O-V-E Power Point.

Part II of our series shows how you can write good presentations | foto: Profimedia.cz

First, they think it gives them "power" and all men like to THINK they have a point.

This is especially true whenever they’re talking to women, or trying to understand their shopping habits.

In the latter, most men do not realize that women do NOT have a point concerning this subject. To them, shopping IS the point!

Oh yes, and to spend your money, even when they have their own.

Making cool slides
To make cool Power Pointies, you must use cool colors or backgrounds.

If you use backgrounds, do NOT use anything that looks to "busy" or boring or non-macho. In other words, no pink backgrounds.

You also want to avoid bright colors, unless you intend to try to burn out people’s retinas.

While this could be a good thing in combat, it’s a terrible thing to do if you want sympathy from your audience or a potential sales client, unless he’s in the market of blinding people.

Using fonts
There are fonts, and there are fonts. Make sure you use only the coolest ones, not "sissy" ones, unless your audience is indeed a bunch of sissies.

---

Then if it is, lots of luck, because you’ll need it. Sissies don’t like "Power" Point, or anything with the word "power" in it at all. They’re sissies. There’s not even a White Sissy Power People’s Movement, nor a Sissy Socialist Club!

Using "correct" English
When using Power Point, just remember that it’s NOT a word processor, like Microsoft Word is.

Let’s not try to confuse these two products, for it only upsets Bill Gates, and it’s never nice to upset the richest man in the world.

Tomorrow, we’ll explore some of the most usefuel phrases Power Point Pontificados just love to stick into their presentations to add "power" to their point.

. Jokes of the Day: More Great Bumper Sticker Slogans

Here are some more popular slogans from some great bumper stickers.

1. Important papers move themselves when you’re not looking.

2. I am only hopeless if you walk away.

3. If you can read this you are tailing me too close!

4. Don’t ask me why, ask me where you want it.

5. If roses are red and violets are blue, oh forget it.

6. Pavel’s Law: You cannot fall off of the floor in a pub.

7. The average woman prefers beauty over brains because all women know that men see better than they think.

8. "Change" is guaranteed, except from most vending machines.

Angličtina vychází od pondělí do pátku.

Najdete ji také v bezplatném deníku Metropolitní expres.

Kalovi pište na adresu: [e-mail]